Ideally, & clearly not for all, but for the majority, shouldn't female sexuality & male sexuality complement one another? Shouldn't male sexuality aim to promote female pleasure as well?
Hasn't evolution designed sexual desire to promote reproduction?
Granted, human beings & human society have moved beyond sex-for-reproduction only, but our origins can't be denied entirely. At least how it seems to me.
As for the rest, I won't argue about society's message to men & women, but my experience, & that of many of my peers, was quite the opposite. It seemed as though women held the reigns, at least during the formative years.
How things appeared from the other side, of course, I can't say. I can only listen & learn.