It depends: did your mother convert before you were born? Or after. If the former (or you yourself converted) then you're a Jew. If not. Then not.

The only feasible solution here is as simple as it is unlikely: a sovereign Palestinian state in Gaza & the West Bank, with a Marshal Plan-like program to galvanize the economy, & compensation for lands taken.

Return?

No. Sorry. Without a Jewish majority what's the point in Israel at all?

Give settlers in the West Bank a year or so to return, with help from the state, otherwise become Palestinian citizens, with Palestinian passports. Israel will intervene in the case of pogroms but otherwise they're on their own.

Ridiculous?

No more so than the PM & Likud following policies identical to Hamas: perpetual conflict aimed at eventually destroying one's opponent altogether.